Happy First Birthday Jett

Dear Jett,
I have no idea where time has gone this past year. I can still remember that moment where you kicked me one last time before they took you out of my belly, like it was a week ago! I know I say it all the time, but you are my ray of sunshine, my bright spot on dark days, and my cuddly lovey baby boy. You are so much fun to be around and have quite the funny personality. You adore your big brother and I know you will be great friends. It's such a joy and privilege to watch this special sibling bond form between you two. It's hard to say what toys you like to play with because you just want what Holt is playing with. You like to throw balls and chase them. You drop things and pick them up, you like to open and close doors, and you love to chase Bentley or daa-daa as you call him. That's your only word really, you know Bentley the doggy as daa-daa. Same as your older brother did. You say Mama when you are really mad or want some attention or to get down from your highchair, but I am not entirely sure you mean it as me your Mama. In the car you like to "talk" to me and Holt by getting us to copy what you are doing. We make the same sound and you copy us back. Holt thinks this is hilarious. You love bathtime and playing with a bunch of toys and sucking on washcloths. You also start bobbing up and down and flailing your arms when you hear music, you're quite the dancer.

We got off to a rocky start when you were born because you cried for the first 4 months of your life it seems like. I'm sure it wasn't that bad but when I think back to that time, it sure felt like it. The rest of the year you have spent on my hip or in my arms. There is really no place you would rather be. You reach to get down only to get there and turn and reach back up for me to hold you some more. I have gotten very talented at using one hand to get things done. I cherish the times that you still want to be held because before long you'll be off and running wanting to spend all your time with Holt. You are finally a great napper, but you have always been a great sleeper at night. You even reach for your bed when you are just done being rocked. Some nights you don't want to read your books even, you just lay your head down on my shoulder so I can rock you. It's so sweet. You are very happy unless you are teething. You got your top 4 teeth in about a week, and that explained a lot. Now you have 6 teefers!

You are a good eater, so far. You will try whatever I put in front of you and most the time you like it. You really like yogurt, meatballs, bananas, and eggs. I keep telling your brother that you will be bigger than him by next year if he doesn't start eating better! I am so proud of you and your willingness to try new foods! You adjusted great to whole milk, except for the whole tummy thing. Poor guy. We are officially bottle free, a feat I wasn't sure would happen because you really liked your bottle!

You love people. You don't really have much of the stranger anxiety, as long as I am near. You have even warmed up to other people holding you when I am around, but usually people you know. It's usually short lived, but it's a start. Daddy really loves it when you crawl over to his feet and reach up to be held. He gets really surprised that you want him and he just loves to know you love him so much too. You are also very sensitive. You do not like to hear the word "no". You almost immediately start crying and crawl over to me. I see what you're doing...and it's working.

I can only imagine what this next year holds for you as you grow and change into a little boy. You aren't quite ready to walk yet, but I'm sure you will be in a couple months. It's a joy to be your mommy and I'm holding you to that promise you made me...that you will be my baby boy forever.

One year stats:
21lbs 10oz (60%)
30.5in (75%)
Size 4 diaper
Size 4 shoe
12-18month clothes

Silly face

You were so happy to ride the carousel for the first time

Loves to swing

Trying to be like Holt

Cherishing these moments, they are over so quick

This is 30

I've contemplated writing this blog a lot. I figured I would go for it.  30 years is a long time. You meet people that make you who you are, you live through things that mold your character, you endure challenges. Or maybe you don't. I did and for me This is 30. This is personal, this is raw, this is real, this is my first 30 years. This is 30, a list of things that have made me who I am at 30, in chronological order, for the most part.

This is 7lbs 8oz at birth, born in Oklahoma City on September 4th 1983

This is getting a baby sister at age 3

This is have my innocence stolen by a daycare worker

This is moving to Oregon at 6

This is the loss of my Grandpa and Uncle within a month of each other

This is moving to Texas at 9

This is always being the shortest and smallest in my class

This is having a cosmetic procedure on my ears at 13 (they stuck out)

This is my parents divorce in 8th grade

This is getting braces in 10th grade

This is teenage girl drama

This is being accepted to TCU

This is first love heartbreak

This is my 2 half brothers being born

This is finding the love of my life and knowing it immediately

This is my first real job making $36,500

This is getting engaged on the empty lot where our home would be

This is my wedding day 

This is the loss of an addict Uncle

This is a career change and being the breadwinner

This is finding God

This is the birth of my first son

This is becoming a Stay at Home Mom

This is moving back to Houston

This is the birth of my second son

This is overcoming postpartum depression

This is a C section scar, a flabby tummy, and stretch marks

This is an imperfect body my husband thinks is perfect

This is learning to love myself again

This is hating myself for not loving myself

This is me questioning myself as a mother daily

This is seeing God in my life everyday

This is personal

This is Me

This is 30

This is 30, this was not easy to post