5 Months!

Oh my gosh, he's five months already. It's getting to that point where I want things to slow down. I was ok getting through the rough first few weeks and getting to where he would sleep through the night, now it is just going by too fast! He is the size I always pictured myself holding perfectly on my hip. He's the perfect sized baby right now. He is strong and sturdy but not old enough to start getting into everything. Stay this way! So many milestones are just around the corner for him. It's that time again when I do his laundry I have a "cannot wear anymore" pile. Feels like I just did this! He's the most perfect little baby I could have ever hoped for. He is light of his daddy's life and he's mommy's best friend. I honestly talk to him like he knows exactly what I'm saying and we're BFFs.


Favs:
-Sucking his left foot
-Smiling and laughing
-Bentley (loves to follow him around the room and he tries to reach out to him, Bentley is not so much a fan)
-Games with daddy
-Listening to mommy sing to him (poor guy!)
-Rattles and sassy links
-His frog stuffed animal
-Books




Dislikes:
-The bumbo for too long
-Starting to notice when I leave the room
-Laying on his tummy too long
-Nose aspirator (I would hate it too)
-Pulling shirts over his head (he's ok if you make sure his eyes are NEVER covered)
-The carseat when he is awake and not sleepy at all

Holt Fun facts:
-Size 2 diapers
-About 16 lbs
-Size 6 month clothes, some 9 month
-Working on rolling from tummy to back
-Trying to sit by himself, kinda doing the tripod but loses balance after about 5 seconds
-Grabs anything you put in front of him and immediately puts it in his mouth
-Fascinated by his hand and fingers
-Still on breastmilk only
-Taking his first plane ride to the Rose Bowl next week!
-Follows us around the room with his eyes and by moving his head
-Starting to recognize his name a little
-Knows our voices and immediately turns toward the sound to find us
-Sleeps from 8-6:30 or 7:30 (depends on if I'm working from home or going to the office)
-A very happy happy baby!

Santa!!!! I know him!

Yesterday Kyle and I took Holt to see Santa for the first time. When I saw the line, I got a little nervous knowing Holt was going to be ready to eat in about 30 minutes or so. Luckily he doesn't have meltdowns when he's hungry like he did as a newborn. He can usually wait awhile longer. I was pleasantly surprised that he was happy as could be in his stroller or in Daddy's arms while we waited for about 45 minutes! That gave Kyle and I plenty of time to discuss which ridiculously overpriced packaged we would choose. The cheapest was $20 all the way up to $45. My first thought when I saw the $45 package was , "That is ridiculous, who would spend that on a silly Santa picture? All you need is one!" I actually needed at least 2, one wallet (for an ornament on the tree) and one 4x6 (for a special 2010 frame). They only had 5x7s, 3x5s, and wallets. Oh but for $7 more you could add a disc to your order and print all the Santa pictures you wanted! $40 later we walked out of there with 2 5x7s, wallets, 2 3x5s (I mean what size is this anyways, who has a 3x5 frame? RIP OFF), and the disc! Luckily it was a good picture because they choose the "best" in their opinion. I think it was perfect! Check him out below.

I immediately put these pictures in my frames and almost got teary eyed in doing so. Why you ask? Because this time next year I will have a 16 month old that will be walking and getting into all sorts of trouble with the ornaments on the tree. I just know that when I pull out my special 2010 Christmas frame with Holt's first Santa picture in it, I will cry. I will be all nostalgic and sad about how quickly time has gone by. He won't be my itty bitty baby anymore. But enough of that, for this year I get to enjoy my itty bitty baby!

Mom Question-Change in Schedule

Ok Mommies, help me out. I'm following my sister in laws lead and turning to you bloggers for tips.

Holt is changing his schedule up on me and I don't know what to do! He's been on a 3 hour schedule since he was born and now he's more like 3-4 hours, which is fine. The biggest question is what to do for bedtime. He needs to be going down around 7:30 or 8 at the very latest. 9 is just too late for him and I'm certain he would sleep better if he could go to bed earlier. We haven't introduced cereal yet, waiting awhile longer, but I'm thinking that might be the answer. As of now I feed him around 5:30 or 6 and then again before he gets ready for bed which sometimes isn't until 9. He needs to have already been in bed but he'll never make it if his last feeding is at 6. If I introduced cereal, I could still keep that one feeding at 6 and give him cereal while we eat, then he can get ready for bed. Right? What are some tips for moving his bedtime up while satisfying his belly at the same time? I just feel like he is so so so tired and a nap around 7:30 seems pointless to me. What did you do? Or what have you heard from others?

Holt is 4 months!

Already! He's just about to start marking off more and more milestones. Holt is 14lbs 10oz (50%) and 26in (75%). He's a very very happy baby. He's rarely fussy, smiles all the time, laughs out loud when I laugh out loud and when I dance, screams loudly (Daddy doesn't think it's normal a little boy should scream that loud), and is such a joy. He's still not rolling over, but the doctor says that is normal because he is taller than most babies. His little muscles have to work extra hard to get him over, but he should be rolling over within the month. He's so so so close it just takes a finger poke to get him over. He is still exclusively given breastmilk (patting myself on the back for that one) although we will introduce cereal when we feel he is ready. The doctor says he is ready to give it shot, but I want to see him really interested in us eating. Therefore, I put up his high chair so he could start to sit with us at meal time. Here are a few more facts about the Holtster.


Facts
-Size 2 diapers
-6 month clothes
-Still eats every 2.5-3 hours
-Sleeps from 9pm-6am on average

Likes
-Grabbing things from us when held in front of him (immediately goes into his mouth)
-Shaking his rattle ball
-Watching Mommy and Daddy make fools of themselves trying to get him to laugh
-Recently taken an interest in Bentley
-Laying on the floor talking, cooing, screaming
-Watching TV
-Making gurgling razz sounds
-Smiling
-Following me wherever I go
-Looking at himself in the mirror
-The toy on his carseat the straps from side to side
-His lovie
-Grabbing the toys on his activity mat
-Loves grabbing at his feet
-Bathtime
-Reading books

DISlikes
-Going in his carseat, especially when overly exhausted
-Bentley barking
-Staying still
-Getting his PJs on
-Being on his tummy, but getting better

Overall he's very happy and doesn't dislike a whole lot. Everyday is more and more fun with him. He brings the ultimate happiness to our lives. The second I see him smile at me when I go pick him up in the mornings is the highlight of my day as a Mommy. There is just nothing better than the feeling of being a Mom to a happy little boy.

One year ago...

One year ago, my way of thinking changed forever. One year ago, my life changed forever. One year ago, I saw 2 pink lines! I was frustrated that I had not started my period yet since we were trying to conceive. How was I going to know when I was within "the window"? As we prepared to go out of town for Thanksgiving I told Kyle I was going to take a test just to be sure. Normally he rolled his eyes at me and would say, "You're not pregnant." This time he said, "I think that's a good idea." I completely forgot to take the test before I left for work that morning. I left work early so we could get on the road early. I was home about 10 minutes before Kyle and I finished getting my things together. I remembered, "Oh yeah, gotta take that test!" We knew the Holidays would hold drinking and socializing with friends and family, so we wanted to make sure I was in the clear. I took the test. Then I got distracted by packing and remembered I needed to go look at it. I picked it up and nearly passed out. I didn't know whether I want to laugh or cry or scream. The first "person" I told? BENTLEY! "Oh my gosh Bentley, Mommy is pregnant!" It felt weird to say it out loud. I called the doctor and told them about the test and asked them what I needed to do next. Since we were going out of town I had to wait until the following Monday to go get my blood work done.

I had about 2 minutes to figure out how to tell Kyle the good news. I always thought I could have planned something really special for him but I didn't have time. Then the garage door opened, what was I going to say? I put the test in my pocket. When he walked in I couldn't help myself and I pulled it out saying, "This week just got really interesting!" He was so happy. We were in complete shock as we got on the road that day. We also knew we would not be telling anyone, not even family, until after the first sonogram. We wanted to make sure everything was going well first. So we had 4 hours in the car to talk about how we were going to pull off fake drinking, baby names, the nursery, and what our lives would be like this time next year.

Here we are one year later and as I write this, my little boy is laying on the floor playing with his toys, cooing, talking, smiling, and making his new favorite razzing sound. What a difference a year makes!

Four Generations

On November 12, Kyle's grandfather passed away. It was his dad's dad. He was 89 years old and lived a very long, happy, loving life. Grandpa Kummer had been battling the beginning stages of Alzheimers these past few years and we just never knew what each visit would hold. Would he know us? He was living in an Alzheimers home and it was one of the most depressing places I have ever visited. A couple years ago when his memory started going, he made a comment to my mother in law saying, "I will never get to be a great grandpa." When she told me that, it broke my heart. Kyle and I weren't talking about having kids yet, neither were Brett and Amy, and his other grandkids aren't married. The chances did seem very slim that he would get to experience that joy before passing away. When we told everyone we were pregnant last Christmas, we stopped by Grandpa Kummer's nursing home to share the news with him. Again, we weren't sure what that visit would hold. It was a great visit. We showed him the sonogram picture and told him the news that he was finally going to be a great grandpa! You could see the happiness in his eyes even though you couldn't understand him. The only thing we could understand that day is when he said, "Go Cowboys!" He sure wouldn't be saying that this season. In May, when we were back in San Antonio for one of my showers, we wanted to show him my big ole belly so he would really understand that I was pregnant. Kyle's dad didn't think it was a good idea because he had been having an off week. Apparently he didn't look well and he thought we were better off remembering him from our visit in January. Kyle accepted the fact that he had seen his Grandpa for the last time and that it was indeed a great memory for him. We decided not to visit that time and remember him from the time before. Well wouldn't you know Grandpa Kummer surprised us all and just couldn't go yet. We were lucky enough to get one last visit with him in September where we introduced him to his first great-grandchild, a great grandson, Holt Cannon Kummer. For the record, all three of Grandpa Kummer's children had boys, 7 grandsons! So far Amy and I are continuing that tradition for them. Here are some pictures of our last visit with him. He knew exactly what was going on that day. He was so happy to meet his great grandson. Even though Holt will never remember this visit, we have the pictures to show him the joy he brought to Grandpa Kummer that day. For 4 months, there was 4 generations of Kummer boys.

Four Generations of Kummer Boys


Showing Holt his beloved Cardinals hat

You know you're a Mom when...

Yes, we all know we are Mom's the second we hear that sweet cry from our babies, or maybe the first time we hold them. We know that, but we may not feel that way for a little while longer. Here are somethings that made me realize that, yes, I truly am a Mom.

-You secretly wish all your shirts unhooked from the top
-You know without a doubt, you have the cutest baby ever. In fact you feel sorry for other mom's because their babies aren't as cute. You are 100% certain they are jealous that their baby isn't as cute as yours.
-It doesn't phase you to pick dried boogies from someone elses nose, and you've stopped yourself from almost doing it to your husband
-When someone compliments your baby, you're pretty sure they have never told anyone else that because your baby is so special.
-You keep a change of clothes in the car or diaper bag just in case
-You're pretty sure you could write children's books
-You now realize that nursery rhymes don't make any sense, are rather violent, and rarely end well(Peter putting his wife in a pumpkin, crazy lady with a carving knife,etc.)
-You get a little misty every time you do their laundry and add something to the "does not fit anymore" pile
-When talking with friends, it's a fact that you will mention diaper sizes, sleep schedules, and clothing sizes
-You can't wait for doctor's appts to see what percentile your baby is in
-It's difficult to spend money on yourself

As Holt continues to grow, there will be many more of these posts I'm sure!

First Halloween

We had a fantastic First Halloween with Holt. He spent the day in his skeleton sleep 'n' play outfit. It glowed in the dark, but that was hard to get a picture of. He didn't like me laying him on the floor in the dark closet to try and capture that picture.



That night Casey and Becca came over for Chili, trick or treating, and the Rangers game. Kyle absolutely loves Halloween and must add dry ice to all beverages on that day. That is one quality I truly love about him, he's always making sure everyone is having a great time!

Going batty!



Holt was anxious to check out his loot. Ok, I was... knowing I was going to be the one eating the candy anyways. Still can't seem to kick this sweet tooth I developed while pregnant!


He was so sleepy! Holt stayed awake from about 3pm until he finally closed those peepers at 10:30. He was overly tired and had a hard time going to sleep. He's still sleepy today, which is great since it's my first day to work from home! Holidays are more magical with a little one involved. I was so excited about this Holiday, I can't even imagine how excited I will be for Christmas. I plan on creating as many special memories as I can while he is growing up so he always remembers what fun he had on Holidays. I think we're off to a great start!

Holt is 3 months old!

All those people aren't lying when they tell you how fast it will go by! Now if only I could tell the millions of people that ask me if my life has changed to put a sock in it, I'd be happy. I'm enjoying Holt at this age so much. Everyday he is making a new sound and he just smiles constantly. This past week he just started laughing out loud and it's the cutest stinkin' thing I've heard in my entire life! He's just days away from rolling over, but since he absolutely hates laying on his belly, I think he's putting it off. He has found his range in his voice also. One second it's the deepest "OOOOHHHH" the next he is shrieking so loud that Bentley is running for the door. He amuses himself all day long. Every now and then I catch him staring at me, whether Kyle is holding him or he's next to me on the couch. I must admit, I almost want to cry every time I see this. It absolutely melts my heart that he is just so in love with his Mommy. He's making me want to pull an Angelina and Brad and have a whole herd of kiddos! He was recently diagnosed with eczema but it's pretty much taken care of with prescription lotion. He never seemed bothered by it, but the red scaly patches were getting worse and worse, so I had to have it taken care of. Holt can only wear 100% cotton, use Cetaphil to wash, and prescription or Baby Aveeno lotion.

Here are some of his likes and dislikes:

LIKES:
-TV, it was a joke before, now he seriously loves it. Especially FOOTBALL.
-Smiling and laughing
-Talking, he's a serious chatterbox
-Being out and about
-Outside
-Rattles
-He loves his tongue! In and out in and out...
-Bathtime and bedtime

DISlikes:
-Getting strapped into his carrier
-TCU Frog horn
-Not a huge fan of the bumbo yet
-Naps, I'm in trouble
-Being on his belly


Now that I am back at work, full time for only another week thank goodness, our schedule is quite different. I am SOOOOO tired at the end of the week I can barely function.

5am- I wake up and start to get ready in anticipation he could wake up anytime between 5:30 and 6:30. I feed him, put him back down, finish getting ready and load the car, then get him ready. He really loves sleeping in the mornings.
7am-We head out the door
8am-I drop him off at daycare and head to work
9am-I pump at work
12pm-I go feed him his lunch at daycare
3pm-I pump again
5pm-I go pick him up and we head home
6pm-Home to play and talk and get dinner ready, he naps
8pm-Another feeding sometime this hour
9pm-Bath time and bed time. Then I pump to make up the ounces I need for the next day. I get his bottles ready and I get ready for bed.
11pm-Feed him again, catch some ZZZs

It's even more exhausting to type it out. Just to see him smile in the mornings and when I pick him up at night, makes it all worth it. I never saw myself as a working mom, but it truly is a great balance. It will be even better when I'm home for 4 days and at the office for 3. I just hope I can continue to do a good job at both. The "I just had a baby, give me a break" card can only last so long. First and foremost, I want to be the best mom and wife I can be, my career comes second. We're looking forward to his first Halloween in another week. I love him to pieces!

Pumpkin Patch

Tonight we finally made it to the pumpkin patch for some pics! I've been trying to go every single weekend since October started, and now that there is a week left, I finally made it! Holt was a great sport even when we tried to make him lay on top of the pumpkins. We probably took 200 or more pictures and probably have 10 good ones. All you need is one right!?

I figured it out...

You know why us women, and especially now that we're moms also, can come across as bitchy and nagging? Because we don't ask for help. We think we can do it all. We think our husband can read our minds about the messy house or the fact that the laundry is still waiting to be folded.

First of all, most men don't care about these things. I have tested it. While I was pregnant, I nicely asked Kyle to pick up anything that was on the ground since I couldn't bend over anymore. There was a single Qtip in the middle of our bathroom floor. I thought to myself, "How long will it stay there?" It was bugging the heck out of me, but I would rather step on it than attempt bending over on tile floor. You know how long it stayed there? Well over a week until I couldn't take it anymore. I hastily bent over to pick it up while somewhat screaming to Kyle, "YOU DON'T SEE THIS DOWN HERE?! I TOLD YOU I NEEDED YOU TO PICK UP EVERYTHING ON THE FLOOR SINCE I CAN'T!" I honestly don't think he even noticed the Qtip on our floor at all and if he did, it certainly didn't bother him like it did me. I bet if I had just asked the very first time I saw it, if he would please throw it away, he would have kindly obliged. Neither of us would have given it any thought. He wouldn't have thought I was being a biotch and I wouldn't have had to scream.

So you see, if we would just ask the first time something bothers us or ask when we need help, we would probably be a lot nicer to our husbands. Even better, they would be happy to help instead of feeling like they have to because we screamed at them. I'm going to work on this.

I'm quickly learning that I can't do it all and I need to ask for help. I'm on the go from 5am until 11pm now that I'm back at work. Instead of glaring at Kyle while he cozily sits on the couch watching TV while I am pumping or fixing bottles or cleaning up the kitchen, maybe I should just ask him to help me get the bottles ready? I am willing to bet that he would and have no problem doing so. I'm looking forward to seeing how this epiphany will change my life, my mood, and my marriage. Glad I could save the rest of you the trouble of waiting to figure it out.

Teacher's Pet

Holt's First day of Daycare

As most of you probably know by now, I have embarked on my journey of Working Motherhood. This is an entirely new and different type of Motherhood. I returned to work on October 4th. I was in complete denial about returning to work so I really did not think much about where Holt was going to go until he was about 4 weeks old. Did I want a nanny? Did I want him in daycare? Did I want to sell everything I own and live in a box just so I could be with my baby all day? (It wouldn't be that bad, I'm choosing to return to work.) I called the daycares around my house, no openings. I searched online Nanny services and immediately got freaked out about some stranger coming into my home and caring for my baby the way I had for 12 weeks. I called a daycare by my office, BINGO. They had an opening. Just to be sure I called other daycares around my office, NO OPENINGS. I sure hoped I liked the school since it was looking to be my only option. In the beginning, I didn't think I would want him at a daycare where he would be left alone all day without much attention. Then I started liking the idea of security that it offered. Needless to say, he is enrolled in that daycare by my office, about 3 minutes from my office to be exact. I wouldn't have it any other way! I'm allowed to go feed him at lunch time and I like that I am so close in case they needed me for something. Moving on...there are several things I have noticed about Daycare.

-It's great people watching. I am there for about 30 minutes or so at lunch so I observe the kiddos (only 4 allowed in the infant class) and wonder, "Why are they here?" Then sometimes I have to feed him before we go home so I see their parents pick them up. Interesting. "THAT's what her mom looks like?" "Man, his dad is short, he's screwed." And "Wow, her parents are old."
-The teacher, in her broken English, loves talking smack about the kids and their parents. "This one is spoiled, her parents let her sleep in bed with them." "This one only wears organic diapers and eats organic food, what a pain." Surely she has nothing bad to say about my perfect child right?
-That brings me to my next observation, I'm certain my child is perfect compared to the other monster's in his classroom. I now understand why everyone mom thinks their child is the best and most perfect child in the world. I'm just glad that it's actually true for me. :)
-I learned quickly the most efficient way to drop off and pick up your child by observing the other moms. DO NOT bring your purse in. Keys only. Smart. I'm considering never carrying a purse now that I have a child. How annoying is that and a diaper bag?
-I have a crusty kid. I always told myself I wouldn't have a crusty kid. Every kid in daycare is crusty.They are always getting their noses wiped and coughing up stuff. When I pick him up he has a nose full of boogers and sleepies all over his face. I don't even mind, I'm just happy to see my crusty baby.

OOPS! Don't make of mess of your outfit at school or you get to wear clothes that don't match!


This is all sounding like I didn't have a hard time dropping him off the first day. I cried for about 5 minutes in the car before I could get him out. He was sleeping so peacefully and had no idea that this was the first day we would be separated all day long. Poor guy never saw it coming. I cried carrying him in, cried handing over his bottles, cried handing him over, and then smiled when I saw him smile at me. It's like he was saying, "It's ok Mommy, see I'm just fine." I cried on my way to work, cried when my mom called to see how I was doing, cried when Kyle called to see how I was doing. After I saw him at lunch, I didn't cry anymore. He was happy and well taken care of. I'm certain he is the teacher's pet. She always tells me wonderful stories about him and how happy and smiley he is all day long. Rarely sleeps, but also rarely fussy. I look in the window on the door before going in sometimes and she's almost always looking at him adoringly. I hope he has this effect on people his whole life. She's also told me he's a bit of a chatterbox. He loves "talking" to her and the hanging animals on his bounce and mobile.

There's that smile!

Starting in November I will be working from home on Mondays and Fridays. I think I get the best of both worlds by getting my adult interaction at the office 3 days a week, and getting to be a Mommy to my little boy the other 4 days! Now I'm off to finish my Mother's Milk Tea to keep up my supply...it's never ending I tell ya! A breastfeeding working Mom is an entire blog in itself, I'll be sure to fill you in on that when I have more time.

I Didn't Know...

These are some things I didn't know about myself, motherhood, and life in general before Holt came into our lives.

I didn't know:
-I was a speed eater. Thinking about signing up for the Hot Dog Eating contest on the 4th next year because I can eat so fast now.
-That going to dinner at a reasonable time meant eating with the Senior Citizen crowd
-That going to the mall during the week meant the Mall Walkers would be out in full force(see above for age group reference)
-I would complain about the weather and heat so much
-I would need a chiropractor from all the leaning over and lifting
-Most my conversations would start with "I saw on Oprah..."
-I was still so immature because I laugh when Holt rips one or grunts when he's having a BM
-That changing so many diapers really wouldn't bother me at all
-I would be so THIRSTY and so HUNGRY while breastfeeding
-I would cry at every birth I see on TV from here on out or cry at stories that involve children, or cry at baby lotion commercials, or cry at...pretty much everything.
-I could be so enraged at bad drivers and desperately want to roll down my window and yell "I HAVE A BABY IN THIS CAR YOU A#%$&*^!!!" Seriously contemplating getting a BABY ON BOARD thing for my window.
-That letting him sleep on me would make me so happy, nothing compares
-Differentiating myself as a mother and a wife would be so difficult
-I would see my husband in a whole new light. Watching him smile at Holt is sometimes better than watching Holt smile at him.
-I would want to video record everything he does so I don't forget a second
-I would be so bad at getting those videos and pictures so I don't forget a second
-Getting his baby book together would take me so long, still haven't started.
-I could already be thinking about a second baby so soon (not happening, I've just changed my mind about how far apart I want them)
-That my dog would really be moved to the back burner.
-That my husband would really be moved to the back burner.
-My clothes seriously wouldn't fit after 2 months, still!!!
-Having a kid brings out the kid in you (Love me some Disney Tunes!)


I'm sure there is more, so I'll probably add to my list as more time goes by!

2 Months!

Holt is 2 months old! We kicked off his 2 month birthday with a trip to the pediatrician for his first round of shots. I thought for sure I was going to cry at the sight of so much pain being inflicted on my baby, but I pulled it together. He did pretty well too. He is 10lbs 14oz, in the 25th%, and 24inches, in the 75th%. He's tall and skinny! The pediatrician says she can't find a thing wrong with him, I agree!

He has been such a joy. Yes we were tired the first couple of weeks, but once he got this sleeping thing down, he's been great! We got very lucky with such an easy baby.

Favs:
-Bath time! Kyle enjoys giving him his baths so they can have some guy time
-Listening to music, he kicks and squeals with such excitement like it's the best thing EVER
-Having conversations, we talk back and forth. He tells me all about his day.
-Learning TCU chants
-Waking up in the mornings, wakes up with a big smile on his face ready to face the day
-Watching TV, especially football
-Watching the ceiling fans and lights
-Sleeping in his swing (Thank you Meme!)
-Sleeping on Mommy
-Running errands, or just being out and about



DISlikes
-Nap time during the day (but it's because he sleeps so well at night, he can take cat naps during the day in return for 6 hours at night!)
-Being alone (like if I leave for a second to go to the restroom)
-Changing his diaper (especially the first one of the day)
-Getting strapped in his carrier
-Startling himself at naptime

Typical schedule:
5am- Wakes up for a feeding, goes back to sleep
8am-Wakes up for a feeding, wants to go back to sleep but instead I get ready, then get him ready. We read a book and say his morning prayer. I have my breakfast while he swings, and usually falls asleep. I take advantage of this time and do a Brazil Butt Lift Workout
11am-He eats and we play with rattles or run an errand. I try to get out at least once a day. If not, he sits in his Boppy and watches me fold clothes or we "talk". He fights this next nap the hardest, and I'm lucky if he'll sleep for 30 minutes. Just in time for me to eat some lunch and waste time on Facebook.
2pm-Another feeding. Then we go to his nursery and listen to music on my iPhone with the Pandora app. He loves Toddler Radio and I especially love when they play Disney music. I sing out loud, although I'm probably damaging his hearing, and he watches me and smiles. Bentley joins us on the blanket and is finally warming up to his new little buddy. He likes to lay right next to him and even allows Holt to kick him. Holt usually falls asleep in my arms while I'm doing stuff around the house so I let him sleep on me until his next feeding. Usually only about 30 minutes again.
5pm- Another feeding. We briefly play with something. I try to always talk to him about what we're doing, describe the colors and let him feel different textures. Like, "This is your orange rattle. Do you like the sound it makes? This is how you shake your rattle. Feel it?" I like to think this is making him a genius. He swings while I figure out dinner and wait for Daddy to get home and rescue us. He plays with Daddy when he gets home and rarely falls asleep again at this time.
8pm-Feed him. He gets a bath or just gets ready for bed and we put him to bed at 9pm after we says his prayers and listen to Jesus Loves Me. This has been working well for us. It took us awhile to figure out his "bedtime". Since he's becoming more regular in his schedule, this has worked out great. Finally, Kyle and I enjoy some time together in the living room.
11pm- I feed him one last time before I go to bed. He goes right back to sleep and we hope for another great night!

This next week is my last on maternity leave. I cry daily almost thinking about it. I return to work on October 4th and Holt will go to daycare. The daycare is about a minute from my office and I can go whenever I want to visit him! My bosses are being very kind and allowing me to work from home on Mondays and Fridays starting in November. So 3 days in the office and 4 day weekends. I will still be working on Mondays and Fridays, but it will be such a relief to not have to commute those days and spend more time with Holt. AND we only have to pay part time daycare tuition! So in other words, I hope October flies by since I'll be working full time that month. It's going to be tough because Holt and I are becoming great buddies. I'm sure he'll be fine and I'll be the sad one.

First Mall Outing

Holt and I ventured to the mall for the first time yesterday. It was a gloomy day and I thought it would do our moods good to get out of the house. But to be perfectly honest, I really just wanted an Auntie Anne's pretzel (jalapeno with cheese dip, mmm). My mouth was watering every time I thought about one so I went all the way to the mall to get it. This would be my second time getting the stroller out of my car and I was hoping I didn't look like the "newbie" that I knew I was. Well if Supermom and her 2 kids hadn't whipped into the parking space next to me, I would have gotten away with it. Before I could even compose myself to get out of the car and face the 5 minute challenge of getting the stroller out, Holt in, diaper bag and emergency distraction toys packed, Supermom had her 3 year old out in a stroller and her 9 week old safely strapped to her in a Baby Bjorn. There was smoke coming off her sneakers and I swear she said "Eat my dust Newbie." No actually Veronica was very nice, it's amazing how much you learn about someone in a 30 second walk from the parking garage. I even said to her, "You look like a pro!" Dangit, I just exposed myself! UGH, to make matters worse she had to help me figure out how to lower the back part of my stroller because the carrier wouldn't fit. On the way into the mall she said, "You go it?" No Veronica, I want you to walk around with me until we leave to make sure I'm doing this right, OF COURSE I GOT IT. No really, she was very nice and invited me to her Stroller Strides workout class, you get to use your baby to work out. No thanks, I'm playing the "I had a C Section card" as long as I can. So off she went to buy her daughter shoes for school and I went back to the car to get the item I needed to return...crap.

So I got to the register to return the item and this curious little girl walked away from her mom, who didn't even notice, to come look at Holt in the stroller. I noticed she was holding a bird feather. Like the kind you see on the ground in a park, the kind you DO NOT touch because it's so disease ridden. Well her mom, Mom of the Year (not), let her carry this nasty thing around. She kept looking at me and looking at Holt. I tried my best to smile but all I could think was "Please do not touch my child with that nasty feather or your SARS infected fingers! Get away from the stroller." I stood there with a half smile while I slowly turned the stroller 180 degrees away from her. Then I returned the item and contemplated using the store credit on myself or Holt...he won. I found super cute outfits on clearance for like $4 each. This mall outing was looking up finally!

From there it was off to find some clothes for me that accomplished a few things: hiding the leftover belly, looking stylish, and going past my knees when I pull them up. I decided until I start working out again and discover what my new body will look like, I'm a hostage to elastic waisted bottoms. Bring on the leggings! It's too hot for jeans anyways right?

By now I'm dying for that pretzel! Just a new nursing bra purchase away from my treat! I look at the clock, I have about 15 minutes before he wakes up starving to make my purchase, get my pretzel, and get home. 2-3 hours goes by really fast, by the way, when you are nursing your baby. Auntie Anne's here I come, and it's going to be 10 minutes before my delicious jalapeno pretzel is ready. NOOOOOOO!!! The whole reason I forced myself to the mall in the first place! I decide any flavor will do and I just get the original. Still quite tasty. I booked it out of there hoping Supermom and I didn't cross paths again on our way to the parking garage. Of course not, her car was long gone when I got back there. After one more stroller through the door struggle and another stranger asking me, "You got it?" (in which I replied YES as the wheel got stuck on the door so clearly I did not) I made it to the car and devoured my pretzel. This newbie made it home just in time to feed him. I felt so accomplished for the day then I realized it was 1:30. I was exhausted. How was I going to pass the time until Kyle got home??

Special Moments

In my five weeks of being a new mom, I have experienced many special moments. Now that Holt is getting a little more stability and strength, he seems to be growing everyday! Yesterday there were two sweet moments that I wanted to remember and since I'm behind in whipping out his baby book, I thought I would at least write about it so I can refer back to it.

I was feeding him yesterday afternoon and he grabbed onto my pointer finger. I thought it was just a reflex and I went to pull my finger away to change the tv channel or something of that nature. He grabbed onto it even tighter, so tight that I couldn't pry it loose. Again I thought this was a reflex, so I tried again. Again, as soon as he felt me start to pull away he held on even tighter. I realize whatever channel I was trying to change was insignificant compared to my baby just wanting to be that much closer to me. I really started to tear up at the thought of leaving him to go back to work in about 6 weeks and missing more of these sweet moments. How in the world am I going to manage? I'd rather be poor and happy.

Another special moment yesterday was at his bath-time. This is normally a time he hates, but is starting to get used to it. (Partially because he loves the fish towel from Grandma Kummer that keeps him warm the entire time, if you don't have one, get one!) The other night Kyle mentioned that eventually bath-time was going to be he and Holt's time. So instead of hovering to make sure the water was just the right temp and that he cleaned his hands off, I decided to go get his pj's and diaper ready for when he got out. I walked back by the bathroom and the love between Holt and Kyle stopped me in my tracks. I stood in the doorway staring at Kyle holding him in his hands, facing eachother, just smiling back and forth. There was my tall, strong, football playing husband making sweet babytalk to our little boy all in hopes of catching a smile from him. At that moment, I realized I had everything I wanted in life (so far...) and that this was my life. A life I always dreamed of and now it's mine. God is so good and I thank him everyday for the blessings he has given to me. Just thought I would share because we all need a reminder of what life is really about.

The First Month

We survived the first month together as a family! I can't believe it's already been a month (well I'm a week late posting about it, better late than never). I must say, we have a very happy baby. He keeps us calm and in turn we keep him calm. The pediatrician remembers him from the nursery as one of the most chill babies she has ever seen. I think we'll keep him. Here are some of his favorite and not favorite things so far:

Favs
-Walks in the stroller
-Tummy Time on his activity mat, he loves talking at this time
-Being Mommy's tree frog (sleeping all curled up on my chest)
-Naps with Daddy
-Looking at lights and ceiling fans ALL day long
-Moving constantly, he's my squirmy worm (also explains the constant and sometimes painful movements in the womb)
-Looking at Freddy the Frog on his bouncer
-Nighttime routine of saying our prayers and listening to Jesus Loves Me
-Being held


Least Favs
-Diaper Changes, still.
-Changing clothes, still.
-Bath time, this is more of a love hate relationship. Some nights he loves it, some nights he hates it.
-Sleeping (luckily only hates it during the day)
-Socks
-Peeing himself when he sleeps, who wouldn't hate that?



A typical day for us goes like this, our schedules are all contingent upon when he wakes up for his middle of the night feeding:
9am-
Get up for the day and get him ready after eating. We read a book or play with our rattles. I eat breakfast and he sits in his bouncer. This can last anywhere from 2 seconds to 20 minutes. We go on a morning walk.
11am-
I try to make myself look presentable while he chills or naps. Eats around 11:30 or 12:30. I eat quickly and try to pump if he goes down for his long nap.
2pm-
If he wakes up from his long nap, we go do tummy time after he eats. If this is now the time of his long nap, he sleeps and I either pick up the house or rest myself.
5pm-
Usually a feeding in here somewhere before Daddy gets home at 6. Sometimes the feeding is right before we eat at 7ish.
7pm-
Daddy time! He takes him while I shower or mess around on the computer. Sometimes we go to dinner. Another feeding before he gets ready for bed around 9pm.
9pm-
Bath time every other night. We read a prayer and say a prayer together. We play the Jesus Loves Me lamb from Grandma Kummer. He goes down until the next feeding around 10:30 or 11pm.
11pm-
Last feeding of the night. He has slept until 5am a few times, 4am a couple times, but typically wakes up around 3 to eat. See how this can affect our whole day?

He eats 8 times a day and I try to pump at least once, aim for twice. He starts daycare when I go back to work in October and I need a hefty supply built up for that!

He's really a good baby and makes us so happy. We've enjoyed visits from all the grandparents the past 2 weeks and are looking forward to our first TCU game next weekend, on my 27th birthday!

I miss my hubby...

No, he's not out of town. He's here and he's been here everyday since Holt was born. But I miss him in other ways. Another thing no one can prepare you for after having a baby is how your time management changes. We all know it's going to happen, but until you are in that situation you can't see how it will go. So as I am more in love with him than ever seeing him as a dad, I miss my hubby! I love seeing Kyle as a daddy to our little boy. He is everything I knew he would be as a father. He just adores Holt and could spend all day looking at him, just like me. I miss being able to curl up on the couch next to Kyle and watch a movie or tv. We've watched a movie together, but it was often interrupted by an adorable crying baby boy. When given any spare moment when Holt is asleep, I also take that opportunity to catch some ZZZs. Not by choice either, Kyle makes me knowing how sleep deprived I get at night. He bought a new truck 2 weeks ago and I have yet to ride in it. In the past he would have come home and I would have jumped right in for a joy ride. But, he doesn't have the car seat set up in there yet. I miss the one on one time with Kyle that we took for granted before. Don't get me wrong about any of this, we are in love with our baby and would not change anything. We look forward to getting him ready for bed together and reading his prayers every night. We almost fight over who gets to hold him during our nightly routine. Ok, not fight but I secretly want to hold him every time. Although I find it adorable when I glance up from reading to see Kyle just staring at Holt with the utmost of love.

My point is, although we're on this new journey together and we wouldn't change a second of it, I was surprised to look at Kyle recently and think to myself, "I miss him." So with that being said, when Grandma and Grampa Kummer get here on Friday they're sending us on a date! Woo hoo. Now to find the best possible restaurant choice within 5 minutes of our house...

What they don't tell you: Labor and Delivery

As promised, here is what they don't tell you about labor and delivery, and after. Now remember I had a C Section, so I can't speak for those of you that will deliver vaginally.

-So so so thirsty, not so much hungry, but so thirsty. The cup of water or even just an ice chip after that delivery will taste like the best water or ice you have ever had.
-C Section Moms, your mouth will be so incredibly dry afterwards, like not the slightest bit moist. AND you can't have ice or water until they think your tummy can handle it. Could be hours!
-I feel bad looking at people's pictures after giving birth and thinking, "Wow she really packed on the lbs at the end." Those lbs are the bags and bags of fluids they pump in you all day. You will not recognize your own face. And your ankles, pshhh, say goodbye to those for about a week. Can you say tree trunk legs?
-You and your baby will both be in diapers after delivery
-Pooping the table: it happens
-You'll sweat so much the first night even if the room is freezing because of the anesthesia leaving your system. I mean you'll drench the sheets.
-I secretly wished I had a catheter all the time, awesome. C Sections, get up the next morning and walk around. It will hurt and you can't do much about it, but the sooner you get up and moving, the better the recovery.
-You have never feared, yet looked forward, to a bowel movement so much.
-Send your baby to the nursery at night for some uninterrupted sleep
-Pack nightgowns and a robe, pajama pants will get destroyed and be very uncomfortable. (Have nightgowns at home too.) Much easier when they come check you and change your diaper. :)
-It is one of the most emotional days you'll ever experience
-Take everything left in the bassinet when you leave the hospital. (Diapers, tshirts, wipes.)
-C Section moms, get extras of the mesh panties they give you. Unfortunately it's the only think that will go over your incision comfortably for the next week or so.
-Wear a dress home if possible
-Buy Medela Softshells for sore nipples if you plan on breastfeeding. They're made of plastic therefore keeping your clothing off of those sore nips, and they will be sore.
-Once you get home, it does come natural to be a mom. Stay calm and relaxed. Baby can sense that.
-If it works out, go to bed after the last feeding at night, even if its early, while your hubby stays up to his normal bed time. You'll get a couple hours of good sleep before you have to wake up every 2-3 hours to feed.
-The hardest part of it all is resting when they are sleeping. You'll want to do a million other things(like blog when you should be napping) but seriously try to take advantage of the quiet time and sleep. Do other everyday chores when they are awake.
-You'll check to see if they are breathing about a million times a day/night
-Don't be ashamed if you are still in pj's 24/7, weeks after giving birth, you deserve it.


Hmmm, that's all I can remember for now. You will be tired, very tired. We're still adjusting and trying to get a routine down. You'll figure it out.

On a side note, Holt had his 2 week checkup today. He is still under his birthweight at 7lbs 10oz, 25th percentile, and is now 22inches long, 90th percentile. Tall and slim, hopefully he stays that way like his Daddy! All is well with him. Now I'm off to fold his 4th load of laundry in a week before taking a little nap!

Birth Story

Wow, I'm getting around to this much sooner than I expected. My baby boy is sleeping in his bouncer right in front of me. I can't believe he's already a week old. Here is his birth story.

I was induced on July 20th. We got to the hospital around 6:15am and the doctor broke my water and started the pitocin drip around 8:15. The contractions started shortly thereafter. I managed them for a couple of hours so I could experience the labor process. They weren't too bad, but it was a full house that day in labor and delivery and I didn't want to get stuck waiting for the epidural for longer than expected. I'm glad I asked for it when I did because it still took about 45 min to get situated. I got the epidural around 11am. My mom thought my contraction faces were funny because I didn't make a big deal about them. I'd be mid sentence and say, "Hold on", make a face for about a minute, and continue my conversation.



Holt's heart rate was dropping on an off throughout the day depending on the contraction. Around lunch time they put me on oxygen until he made his debut!



I was progressing exactly how I should for a first timer, 1 cm an hour, and the doctor was ecstatic with our progress. This went on until about 6:30 when they determined I was fully effaced and 10cm. Ready to start pushing! The doctor had her doubts all along that Holt would arrive vaginally, but honored my wishes and let me try as long as we were both doing well. Unfortunately, it was not progressing as well as she hoped. His heart rate would drop drastically when I pushed and come back up again with my intense breathing methods once it was over. It was a well coached "Deep breath in, slow breath out" between each contraction. This was proving to be exhausting for both of us. They could see his head, but it was not crowning like they hoped it would have after an hour. Dr. Westerholm made the final call and rushed us to an emergency C Section about 7:30. I was prepared for this all along so I was able to remain calm. Kyle did too. Within minutes they had thrown him some scrubs and started me on the right meds. Although I could not feel anything, the pressure of what they were doing was INTENSE. I couldn't believe it. Kyle said the table was shaking violently as they tried to get Holt out. I kept hearing the doctor say, "This is a big baby, this is a big baby." At one point Kyle said she was on the table pushing down and pulling with her other hand while another doctor also pushed down. All I could think was, "This is going to suck tomorrow!" Haha. He was out at 7:55pm and it took them another 20 minutes or so to put me back together again. The medicine made me so sleepy after his birth that I barely got to experience his first moments. I heard him cry and tears just started flowing. It was one of the most emotional experiences I have ever felt. To see and hear your baby cry is indescribable. The doctor was right about his size, he weighed in at 8lbs and 20.5inches long. That is a big baby, but an especially big baby for me. Kyle got to cut the cord and hold him right away. I was a little out of it, but so happy to have him here.




The first time he recognized my voice, I'm a Mommy!

So he was finally here! I didn't know but after the C Section they take out the epidural. A little too soon if you ask me! They gave me some morphine but I could feel the pain immediately. This forced us to wait on inviting in the anxious visitors in the waiting room! They were going crazy. I kept telling Kyle, "It's ok, I can do it. They can come in." He was adament and said, "No, this is about you, not them. They will get to see him, you need to feel good first." About 30 minutes later I started feeling better. This was about 9:30 and they were going nuts! I was shivering from the medication which was not helping my soreness. Who knew how swollen I would be!

Mommy to the rescue

Grampy and G

Grandma and Grampa

Uncle Trent

First Family Photo

We were discharged on Friday. All of his initial visits with the pediatrician went perfect! We have our 2 week appt next Tuesday.


We're adjusting to our new life. He's waking up once in the middle of the night, and having a hard time going to sleep again. We'll get through it. My mom left today and I am still not sure how we'll get by! She was such a big help. It was harder saying goodbye to her this time than it was when I left for college. I'm nursing him and that is going well too. I turned into Heidi Montag overnight! That is our story and we are so very happy to be home with him. The entire experience has been so surreal. I'm looking forward to seeing my expecting friends and family members go through the same thing over the coming weeks!